Monday, July 23, 2012

Another species CONQUERED

So continues and hopefully completes the series of ridiculous shenanigans to conspire while my husband is away. As you have been able to tell if it crawls and is gross I don't like it...lizards, bugs...INCLUDING cockroaches!! They're nasty, they make weird crunch noises when you step on them, and they grow HUGE out here on the island. There has to be some nuclear radiation explanation for how big these damn cockroaches get out here...and not only do they get big, they're ballsy! They fly right into your face hair or other face parts...adrenaline junky cockroaches.

Tonight I was minding my own business getting ready for bed and putting my puppies in their crates...I leave and re enter my room a whole 5 minutes later and see my big dog, Hades, staring at something moving on my wall...I follow his gaze. Low and behold. The god of all cockroaches. His antennae had antennae...his muscles were bigger than mine! And here he is just chillin on my wall. I let Hades out of his crate as his eyes on set on the monstrous creature...he runs to his bed in the living room and...back into his crate and falls asleep. And my vicious spuds could not aid me on this!! The cockroach would eat him whole. I had then come to the realization, I was...on my own.

I kept repeating "its just a bug" over and over in my head but nothing could have mentally prepared me for what was going to happen next.  I walk into my room guns ((broomstick)) a blazin' and hit the cockroach with my broom handle, only to completely miss it and have it fall into my laundry pile. I crawl onto my bed and realize my broomstick handle can reach the clothes pile!
AN ADVANTAGE!
I start separating the clothes to finally find the cockroach...it knows it has been spotted and heads for a sanctuary...Hades crate, the slumbering beast, Hades, knows his territory
has been invaded and pounces on the vile insect, to only come to the conclusion it's not worth it and goes back to sleep, a moment of hope, gone. The cockroach then scurries under my bed! Armed with my broomstick and my flashlight app, I am still to scared to confront the bug.
AND THEN!

A hero walks through my door!! A friend of mine from back home, Devin, has been renting our 2nd bedroom out for the past 2 months, and he had just returned from work. I alert him of the situation at hand and he goes forth. While he is preparing for a mighty task I find the cockroach under my pillow (yuck I know) and it clambers up my wall in the perfect place for Devin to capture it in a cup and then release it over my balcony.


A part of me is thankful Devin was here instead of Matthew, only because Matt would have killed it. Devin released it...and who knows what would have happened with the death of the Cockroach god on my hands! Word would have gotten out to other cockroaches, and I don't think Spuds, Hades, or myself could handle that.

My special vicious monters(:


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